Thoughts on the Legacy and Impact of the Transgender Day of Remembrance

November 17, 2022 2:25 PM
by Miles Friesen

This weekend, and this day every year, November 20, is the Transgender Day of Remembrance. It started in 1999 by transgender advocate Gwendolyn Ann Smith as a vigil to honor the memory of Rita Hester, a Black trans woman who was murdered in Boston in 1998. The event also commemorated all of the trans people lost to senseless anti-trans violence that year. It's become an important tradition that so many generations of trans people carry each year as we try to make sense of a society that seems hell-bent on erasing us in some of the most brutal ways, year after year. There have been nearly 300 bills proposed since 2021 by state lawmakers across this nation in a calculated attack on the rights of transgender Americans.

So, on November 20, we come together in most major cities across the U.S. and the globe, light candles, and say the names of our trans siblings whose lives have been lost that year. We know at this point in the United States, at least 32 transgender/gender non-conforming individuals have been murdered in this past year because of their perceived gender identity (globally, the number is painfully higher). We say "at least" because these stories go unreported far too often or are intentionally misreported. This happens on multiple levels for no good or right reasons. It would be a disservice not to point out that this type of fatal violence highly disproportionally affects transgender women of color. The intersections of transphobia, racism, sexism, transmisogyny, etc., continue to maintain the systems that leave them intensely vulnerable on many levels.

As a transmasc individual who began transitioning over a decade ago, I would like to share what this day means to me. Spending time with a mixed group of other trans friends recently, especially some older and wiser than myself, I was reminded that who I am and what I’m doing today was somebody else’s dream deferred. Other people did not have the opportunities that I do. They forged the path forward for myself and my trans siblings. I’m not saying my path has been easy, because it hasn’t been on so many levels – but it has been easier than most in a lot of ways. Being transgender is a burden and a gift. We did not know what to expect for the future when we chose to come out and medically transition. That is, for those of us who do have the ability, desire, and privilege to come out and medically transition. We wake up every day knowing that we inherit a long, painful, and beautiful legacy of resistance, resilience, and conviction, and with that, the responsibility to use this privilege of daily existence to further the possibilities for transgender people in the future. I am extremely privileged. My daily reality is the culmination of so many nameless individuals forced to advocate for themselves in a world that would not accept them – which brings me to you all.

My friends, my colleagues, and my community. YOU were also somebody else's dream. You have inherited a legacy of resistance, resilience, and conviction, a legacy of stepping outside the boundaries of what is expected and putting yourselves directly in the line of fire so that people like me have a community to belong to in the first place. And you honor that legacy every single day that we build these relationships to be stronger and even more resilient. There is still so much work to do as many transgender folks, especially trans women of color, are still threatened with excessive violence and discrimination for simply existing. Trans individuals are more likely to experience personal violence because of their perceived gender than they are not – the odds are not, nor have they ever been, in our favor.

The Transgender Day of Remembrance is not meant just for people who are transgender like I am; it is intended for you, too. It serves to honor those connections like ours from the past and to recognize that we together can live out something that was once only a distant dream. Thank you for honoring the struggles of our ancestors/transcestors by being my community and supporting the transgender people in your life today. We ARE the dream when we wake up, keep fighting the good fight and take care of one another. Thank you for letting me share a piece of my story and a bit of context for this weekend's events. A few local events in the LA area will be held on Sunday evening if you’d like to join. The largest one is in West Hollywood, and another one is in Long Beach, as well. All are welcome.

On a final note: As we continue to work toward justice and equality for transgender and gender non-conforming people in Santa Monica and worldwide, we mourn these precious lives we lost in 2022. Please say their names:

Tiffany Banks

Semaj Billingslea

Acey Morrison

Mya Allen

Dede Ricks

Maddie Hofmann

Aaron Lynch

Kandii Reed

Hayden Davis

Marisela Castro

Cherry Bush

Keshia Chanel Geter

Martasia Richmond

Kitty Monroe

Shawmaynè Giselle Marie

Brazil Johnson

Sasha Mason

Chanelika Y’Ella Dior Hemingway

Nedra Sequence Morris

Ray Muscat

Fern Feather

Ariyanna Mitchell

Miia Love Parker

Kenyatta ‘Kesha” Webster

Kathryn “Katie” Newhouse

Tatiana Labelle

Paloma Vazquez

Matthew Angelo Spampinato

Naomie Skinner

Cypress Ramos

Duval Princess

Amariey Lej

Daniel Davis Aston

Kelly Loving

Authored By

Miles Friesen